Daily Archives: May 10, 2013

Day 8 Waking Divergent

Day 8 Waking Divergent

Now I am sitting outside of the Big Cat Zoo off the 115 Hwy, yes there is a days gap, was just too tired to update the journal, too tired to even turn the laptop on. If anyone has contacted me back they can wait till tomorrow for my answer.

Made it over to the Big Cat Zoo off the 115 Hwy, I left Zeldy in the Truck this time, she is barking and howling to get out, I told her to stop, she abated more but all the sounds of the wild animals have her on edge. I let every animal I could find out in the area, there are lots of farms here, yesterday and today. I am struggling with some simple moral questions, do I let all these predators out! To keep them in the cages is cruel beyond belief and a certain death sentence. The big cats have turned on the weaker members of their prides.

The Wolves though are sitting here watching me, they are so intelligent I am wondering what they are thinking. All of them went quite loud when I got here, but have quieted down now watching me, waiting, watching me decide what to do. Some I think are wondering what a human and dog will taste like, others are probably hoping I let them out so they can just run away, others, well they are intelligent!

Yesterday Day 7 I released every farm animal I could find in the area, then went to the zoo, threw some feeder rabbits and other animals into the pens of the cats and wolves. Walked around so they could get my scent. My scent, either they can track me better or some part of their thinking brain will equate me with one of their trainers and hopefully if they encounter me, or come across my scent later, they will keep going and not attack.

I will keep some of the dogs that are following us around now. Those dogs were not happy when I threw them into an enclosed cage, they followed me in, I locked the door, it was that easy. They are grateful that I let them out of the kennel up the street, two big Rottweilers, one male and one female, both with sleek dark coats. The other is a large bull mastiff who is a light brown colour. My dog pack just grew, but I think the extra protection from what I am going to do now will be worth it, I hope.

Well here goes nothing, I fed everyone again this morning, my new Dog pack got fresh meat and kibble. Changing the diet to a long term sustainable and healthier diet.

The Wolves were given fresh dog kibble and fresh rabbits. The other large big cats got fresh rabbits and some large hamsters I found. Sorry to the animals but this is reality, in they went squealing. Cats snarling and slashing, Wolves snarling and tearing, the rabbits and hamsters did not have long to worry about the fear at least.

I have waited for another hour so they cats feel fuller, the wolves feel fuller and hopefully just a little bit more relaxed. I spent the time letting all the rest of the caged rabbits and chickens out, first thing, then shoeing them off. There are a lot of dead rabbits and chickens, I threw them into the pens as well, more feeding frenzy. Zeldy got to grab a fresh rabbit, not so sure of her stomach and a dead rabbit. After she had watched through the open cages the goings on at feeding time, when I tossed in a rabbit into an enclosed pen, she went right in. I closed and locked the door without her even paying me any attention. She will be able to hunt and kill on her own now, I am sure of it.

Every gate on the property is opened up now, some of the back fence has been tore down to make another running away area as well for the big predators, hopefully. I have studied the pens and have found that there are protected places for the staff to stand and open up the pens without exposure to the cats, good for me.

Now it is time to get things going! We need the Wolves and Cats to know that the Dogs belong to me and are not lunch, so it is lets go for a walk time with the Dogs. Zeldy and the new pack did the whole sniffing and intro thing with some of the Alpha personality stuff already starting. Before I let the dogs out, Zeldy was given a brushing and played with me first, letting her rub up against me a lot so her scent would be on me. This way the other dogs would know that she was my pack first, in case they had forgotten this fact.

This is turning into a bright sunny and warm day, great day for dogs to integrate into my pack. Lots of treats later which I had given to them first through the door opening into the pen, This is establishing an Alpha pattern and pack leader pattern first as all the dogs are quite Alpha personality breeds. Then I breathed hard, slowed my breath calmed myself opened the door stood in the way and did not let them out.

After all had calmed down, sat good, received a good doggy treat, just like Zeldy was getting on the other side of me I made sure she was sitting as well Then did I move aside and let the new pack out together for their formal meet and greet, doggy style. Thus my new Divergent doggy pack is created, Divergent Waking new normal I think. There was some doggy sniffing and shoving and greetings and growlings and snappings, all I let go and had under control as soon as it happened.

So far so good, I just started walking away and said loudly and in a command voice, “Dogs follow, Dogs Come now” they all did, I was happy, hopefully it would work out for the best, hopefully.

With the doors secure to the handlers area, the dogs are in here with me to reinforce to the cats that they are my pack it is time for the Cats to be released. All are fed enough so that they will not try to attack us through the cages and should run away. Just in case, I have the shotgun loaded with some bird shot as the first two rounds followed by 00 buck for the next shots. Just in case I need to do a loud bang with the shotgun to get them running, then the next for real protection if needed.
Squeal goes the pulleys as I heave too on the ropes, up go the gates to the Cat pens one at a time. The only Big Cat to stop and stare was the huge Goliath of a Tiger. Man that guy is huge, he unlike the others who ran out quite fast, using claws for traction to get extra speed, he sauntered past slowly. When he was standing free of the pen, his huge head swiveled around the yard assessing the situation, his eyes found mine and then the dogs. He growled, long loud and deeply keeping eye contact with us, then turned majestically as he sauntered away.

I let my breath out, did not even know that I was holding onto it as a matter of fact. Looking down I saw all the dogs, standing with fur raised, low growls in their throats, staring after him. Well that went well I said aloud, each dog turned their heads and looked me right in the eyes then back to the ever shrinking Tiger in the distance. Grabbing the stool, I sat down for a while to relax and let him get as far away as he wanted to go.

I have decided, tomorrow we go to the Toronto Zoo, and look up on the web any other zoo or wildlife area, wildlife rescue centres as well. There might be time, though the Toronto Zoo is huge with many acres and many animals there.

(WDJ)Waking Divergent Journal Index Page

Waking Divergent Journal Day 1

Day 2 Waking Divergent Journal

Day 3 Waking Divergent Journal

Day 4 Waking Divergent

added Waking Day 4.5 Writing Exercise

Day 5 Waking Divergent

Day 6 Waking Divergent

Day 8 Waking Divergent


More to come soon …. 



Filed under Novella Divergent Waking, Writing

Spelling Grammar

Some things to help me/us since you follow my blog now!

When someone posts  a legitimate resource below, I will copy the info and put it into the post here for future reference as well. Ongoing Blog post

As some of you have already surmised, my vocabulary is fairly high, my spelling abysmal and my grammar, so so! Although if I write in Free Form or Prose, then I can do almost anything I want to that way! Love Free Form and Prose
(ps.. right from a Teachers mouth to my ears!)

Than= I’d rather be rich than poor.
Then= I first became hungry then I ate.
There = She is there now.
Their = They have their things.
They’re = They’re going to the mall.
To = They came to the house.
Too = That’s too bad.

Continue reading


Filed under Blog post, Writing

Spoken Word Poetry on Posts and words

(Read, to be read aloud like a Poet Laureate with a beatnik heart, spoken aloud with a cadence set forth, The Spoken Word Poetry on Stage performances)

Here I sit,
for too many things, for you, for others, for answers, for reasons, for hope.

Where are the poets and philosophers of yesteryear?
Are they now dead, gone consumed by the fires and ravages of time?
Perhaps they are reincarnated in the vestiges of self, shadows or former glory.
Perhaps they are fully reincarnated as Filmmakers, Song Writers, Playwrights of the day.

Here sit I,
wishing for a modicum of their talent, a modicum of talent that I believe I possess, evidenced thought former photos and images created, words that flowered and blossomed on the blank white page into a river of thoughts, emotions and expressions given forth from some old and newly tapped well of inspiration.

Sitting here, attempting to dispel the dullness, the cold inside, desperately attempting to open the shutters to allow the Sun’s warmth and rays to shine on this cold heart, cold spirit, dulled and tarnished like a doorknob to the dungeon entrance.

This self made dungeon for sure, made bitter and cold through and through by the hatred of self talk, echos of words remembered, words shot and flung out into time and space by people in moments of nastiness  spitefulness with mean spirited verbal attacks.

Opened up doors, opened up wells of feeling during moments of hope brought on by memories from out of the past.

Doors that should have remained closed and closeted perhaps, the eternal optimist,  the eternal dreamer, the eternal believer in shared feelings that may have not existed, though may be welled behind other doors themselves. Convoluted emotions, twisted feelings around shriveled up hearts, minds that are shattered in their present altered state of closed off corridors and rooms hidden from view.

Here I sit, me yet not me, what was is perhaps no more, what was meant to be may have no future. The future that should have and would have existed given choices made in opposite directions the path left empty and untrod upon.

Sit I here, in the warmth of the air, cold inside, broken and shattered like the reflection in the pond after the hand has scooped out the water of life, but ripples radiating outwards.

I wait,
I wonder,
I try to call forth the muse of creativity while steadfastly avoiding the void.  For to gaze too long into the void is to fall, to lose oneself forever.
Longing for the fingers to convey the allowed words, to create the flow of thoughts that will set me free, I await the rush.

Tenderly now I probe seeking  searching, sharing thoughts, fingers conveying hidden and thus far unshared words, emotions, thoughts and hopes. Remembrances of fingers brushing the skin on the cheek, brushing the stray hair away and up, finger tips warmed by the internal heat of another. The heat also of creativity, longing for either, afraid of one or both, afraid of opened doors soon to be slammed shut again, splintered and shattered on the broken hinge.

Here I sit,
for too many things, for you, for others, for answers, for reasons, for clarity of purpose, for clarity of mind.
The Blankness and Desolation of Blank Pages reflect the shattered and poor words I write, calling for the Muse to arise once again.

The Desolation of lost and useless hope, I sit, I ponder in darkness within and without, alone this night, alone this life, alone this soul.

Here sit I

Here sit we, the culmination of lost, of hurt of hatred of abused of bruised, of tendernesses, of shared love even if so brief, of shared memories, of shared dreams, wants and desires and hopes for the future, now all clouded up with the past, shadows and shadowed skittering and chittering like some small animals seeking hidden passageways while predators circle and peer. Looking to pounce, talons ripping, beaks and fangs gnashing endless death of body, spirit, soul, creativity and passions, die broken in the fading light of day.

Here, sit,
share, feel, comfort, hold, caress, kiss and blossom like emotions set free. No, again why, why not, allow, do not attempt, hear and hearken to pain and suffering of opened doors to inside feelings and hopes. Again hopes die or fade in the waning sunshine of yesteryear or is that the present or perhaps time yet to come. Crushed on the ebb and flows of Time.

Hope springs eternal, hope the saviour, hope the destroyer, hope the desolation of ONE. Hope while visions and memories are made, were made, will be made again, gone like the sunshine replaced by the darkness, the night settles.

Sit, here I vanquishing the beast inside again, the page fills, struggling for hope of creativity, though allowing these words to take shape, form to struggle free, to keep pace with the mind already chapters ahead. Is there hope?

Here I sit,
for too many things, for you, for others, for answers, for reasons, for the end, for the beginning.  I wonder as I sit, here.

.. a song from days ago, played on the radio, reverberates endlessly in the thick skull of the eternal being of hope; “What a Fool Believes” and “The Rose” songs flow together, around behind and in front of each other, endlessly like dueling radios at a beach, the peace of nature, shattering the voices of the night with the tones of Poetry Sung in this present, defined present by the past, the future, the now.


Filed under Writing, Writing Free Form