Get out of Damaged Mind
“Yesterday”, as the cliché goes, “was the beginning of the rest of my life….”
(while your reading, why not click on this link for some lovely and relaxing music by Taylor Davis, this is a sweet song)
< I found an awakening in my in the last year or so, music really inspires me to remembers sometimes though always it elicits emotions and thoughts. >((now if you don’t want to read my wandering thoughts here are two sites that have some info on the brain as well, from a helpful music sort of way ! ))
Taylor Davis – two of my fav pieces she has made;
Awakening – Taylor Davis (Original Song)
and He’s a Pirate (Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean Theme) Violin – Taylor Davis
here is a link to a collaboration with Taylor Davis and Peter Hollens… Both exceptional talents
Doctors always ask what is worse your memories of the present or of the past !
Answer any are bad aren’t they? Long term memory is shot full of holes, recent past memories worse, yesterday is sometimes only a shadow yet some days cling on like ‘Will nots’
Sometimes I dream, sometimes it is a nightmare, some days are in fog some are crystal clear. Which is the true reality, the dream state or the waking state? The Matrix for real!
This week was an experiment, no meds for 5 days. Background info for me; brain injury, fibromyalgia, arthritis just to name a few. Taking Cymbalta to help with the pain and depression, which of course I have depression after dealing with the Health Care Profession in Canada, anyone would be Depressed.
The experiment was better and worse than expected. When on the meds, I have hardly any emotions, foggy like brain and no and I mean no creativity.
Day 1-3 not too much difference
Day 4-5 lots of desire to do things, lots of creativity, but lots and lots of pain as well.
Day 5 evening… depression, anxiety, anger, conflict
Day 5 evening, took meds again … or ….
I found the desire to create to make and to write, the positive. The negative was so much pain I would hardly be able to write this out. Migraines as well, then sleep issues of only being able to sleep 3 hrs a day (no… no naps either) So tired and exhausted state of being.
Two days in a row found me waking with entire stories running around in my empty head. The dreams were so life-like in colour and very visceral. The dreams were almost like a God like perspective one day, then a first person singular, through the lens out of the eyes perspective the other time. Neither stories in the writing Genre that I favour either.
Scramble to find paper and pen, or run out to get laptop fired up to create this writing, this visceral experience to paper or pixels. Distracted, thoughts fading away to a but a foggy memory.
The stories are gone now, lost in the fog lost in my mind, so, get out of my damaged mind. Allow me to put thought to paper again and allow me to feel free. Yesterday I did a small project I had been wanting to do for a long time now. Meds and forgetfulness do not go together. If your reading this and have a normal mind then you will never understand unless you think back to a day that you had a severe head cold or was crying at a funeral. How dark and foggy the mind was, well TADA, similar, o so similar.
My last post was related to music, the music and emotions that come with listening and in this case seeing the visuals associated with the artist. Lindsay Stirling a pixie of a person though the presence of a giant, remember it is not what you look like it is what you project. Taylor Davis today’s music treat similar though very different sort of person and style. Both would enable you to fulfil any projects or emotions you might have. (According to Larousse Chambers dictionary, fulfil is BE – British English and fulfill is AE- American English… who knew before this??)
Still reading?? This is the longest piece I have written in a long time. This is sort of creative, sort of wandering though not a story and not a poem, so this is just a reflection and spasm of thoughts.